


Things We Lost In The Fire

by Scylla87



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Gen, Grief/Mourning, Loss, Regret
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-03
Updated: 2018-09-03
Packaged: 2019-07-06 11:58:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15885588
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Scylla87/pseuds/Scylla87
Summary: When the Legends are called to the past to rescue an 18 year old Mick Rory, Leonard Snart must come face to face with his own past and deal with something he long ago buried. Set during  the events of "Last Refuge".





	Things We Lost In The Fire

**Author's Note:**

> This is a part of a much larger idea that I have for a potential backstory for Len and Mick that we don't really see much of in either show. It's well established that they have known each other a long time, and yet when we are confront with a Mick who has just torched the family home, we get no reaction form Leonard despite the fact that we know they knew each other then. I have always wondered about that. How did he explain that away to himself, what Mick had done? I have plans to expand on this further one day, so let me know if any of you like this story and would like to read more. I have all kinds of ideas for young Mick and Leonard.
> 
> I did go back and watch this episode to refamilarize myself with the content and noticed that the timestamp says 1990 when we find young Mick, but I changed it for the purposes of this story because I can apparently math. In fact the math in this whole episode is fucked up. Both Sara and Mick are meant to be teenagers when they're rescued, but based on the time lines given they both would have been 20 when attacked by the Pilgrim. Something that I don't think fits with the backstories we know about either character. (I'm pretty sure in 2007 Sara is "dead", but I could be wrong about that, I admit. I got the impression from the story they were trying to tell that she was meant to be still fairly young. probably still living at home, thus most likely still in high school, not college, so not 20. And it's pretty heavily established in cannon that Mick was a teenager when he killed his family, at least in the comics it is.) So for the purposes of this story I made Mick 18, or at least about to turn 18, which would put us in 1988 since he was born in 1970.
> 
> A very special thank you to my amazing beta laCommunarde, who totally helped to save the ending. I really appreciate your help with this. And also, thanks to AgentMaryMargaretSkitz, who was not officially a beta but took the time to read this over and give me her thoughts when I was unsure about this. I couldn't have managed to get this in the shape that it is in without either of you. I very much appreciate all the help you both gave.
> 
> Please let me know what you think. I really hope you enjoy it.

Things We Lost in the Fire:

Leonard made his way to the bridge slowly. He was in no hurry to discover where the Pilgrim might attack one of their younger selves. Something about this plan seemed a little too risky, the removing themselves from the timeline part. This whole Legends business had been a complete disaster from the start. Now Rip was proposing doubling the versions of them running around the ship. Like that wouldn’t turn out to be a mistake. As he rounded the corner onto the bridge, the first thing he noticed was the tension in his partner’s shoulders, only adding to his own misgivings about the plan. Mick was never one for words, but over the years Leonard had learned how to read him all the same. There was something about this plan that was upsetting Mick too. “Where we going?” Len asked carefully.

“Outskirts of Central City August 19, 1988,” Gideon supplied before anyone else could speak. “To save young Mr. Rory.”

Hearing the date was like being punched in the gut. Leonard’s eyes cut over to Mick, but the questions he could have asked died on his lips. All this time and they were going to be forced to go back there. He had been spared having to actually see the damage done back then, and he certainly didn’t want to see it now. Unfortunately, he didn’t have a choice. A part of him almost wanted to let the Pilgrim have Mick after all. If that’s what it took to never have to stand in that place again, maybe he was okay with that. But those words wouldn’t come either. “Naturally,” he finally muttered. He could feel Sara’s eyes on him but chose to ignore her, walking away without a backward glance.

“Mr. Snart,” Rip called after him to no avail.

Len had gotten halfway down the hall before he realized that Sara was behind him. The last thing he wanted was to have to go over all of this with anyone. He just needed a moment to think, but even that was going to be denied him. With a sigh he turned around to face her. “Yes?”

“You have to be on the bridge for the time jump,” Sara said simply.

He took in her stance, arms crossed, frustrated expression. Now was not the time to mess with her. “Sure. Let’s go save a homicidal arsonist. Fun times.”

She raised an eyebrow at his biting tone. “I thought you and Mick were good.” It wasn’t meant to be a question.

“Mick and I are complicated.”

Sara nodded knowingly. He didn’t want to have this conversation in the corridor. He didn’t want to have this conversation at all. To halt any questions she might be on the verge of asking Leonard walked passed her toward the bridge again. Better to get this over with as quickly as possible.

 

The house was already on fire when they got there. Of course it was. Leonard knew it was too much to expect they would get to save Mick in the early afternoon before he decided to torch his entire family. He only half listened to the plan as Rip assigned the various Legends their jobs. The weight of the firefighter uniform pressed down on him even more than the memories, and it distracted his thoughts. An hour or so from now he’ll get a frantic phone call begging him to come to the hospital. But that wasn’t really him anymore. Len shook his head. It was important to not get lost in the timeline. None of that would happen to him tonight. It had happened already. It was past. Except it was happening now. It was all so confusing. All he needed to be concerned with tonight was saving his friend from an untimely death. Sitting by her side as she slipped away had been in another life. But that was hard to remember as he looked up at the house.

Pulling himself away from his thoughts took a tremendous amount of effort. He couldn’t afford to get distracted now. The important thing was to find past Mick, save him from the Pilgrim, and then they would be on their way. All the rest of it his past self would have to deal with. After all, he’s already dealt with it before. The others were staring up at the house unsure, focused on the mission; he should be too. “You want us to go into that?” Jax asked suddenly.

“Find Mr. Rory and pull him out,” Rip repeated the mission. “We know he survives this even if he is badly burned, so he has to be around here somewhere.” The last part shouted as they disappeared into the house.

Leonard resisted the urge to correct Rip’s assumption that this was where Mick had received his burns. That was a completely different fire burning out of control. It was difficult not to draw a connection between the two events. There had always been a small voice in the back of his head that wondered if this right here wasn’t the very reason Mick had never gotten his burns treated. He was supposed to look like that, like he had tried to save them. But he hadn’t. Even after all these years the thought filled Len with a rage no one would have thought him capable of. He remembered vividly how it had felt to hit him, remembered breaking Mick’s nose. It took everything he had not to punch Mick right here and now. How could anyone just leave their family to die like that? It wasn’t the first time Leonard had asked himself that question, but as he watched Mick for a moment, deep down he knew. Mick loved the fire, but a small part of him had feared it too. About an hour from now he would call his best friend inconsolable over the whole thing. The only time he would ever admit out loud anything resembling regret for what he had done. The thought struck him from a different angle all of the sudden. “Exactly how fast will removing him from the timeline start to matter?” he asked, turning to face Rip.

The question clearly made Rip uncomfortable. “That’s difficult to determine. Mr. Rory hardly finds the cure for cancer, so it will possibly take longer for the timeline to notice he’s missing.”

“Longer than someone important,” Mick put in himself.

That made Rip look even more uncomfortable. “Precisely,” he admitted. “Of course people who know you will be more readily affected. Though I hardly think any of us will forget you as long as you remain on the ship, and it would take considerable time for the timeline to solidify to the point of your complete disappearance.”

Leonard sighed heavily, looking between the two men and the house. “But if I understand correctly everything he says or does, or rather would have done or would have said, won’t happen until we put him back. So for example, if he were to be taken from the timeline now a phone call he would have made in an hour won’t happen anymore.” Leonard could feel Mick’s body stiffen as the words made it past his lips.

Rip blinked rapidly, an exasperated look on his face. “I hardly think a phone call is an important enough reason to hold off. The Pilgrim could be here trying to kill him at this very moment. I’m sure that he will make whatever call that needs to be made when we return him.”

“But he might not?” Leonard asked as Rip tried to turn away. “Could this affect something like that?” Shock. That was the reason Mick had made the call; Leonard was sure of it. But if he had time to bury his guilt… The thought was unfathomable.

It was clear that Rip was annoyed with this line of questioning. “Yes. It is true that some small details may change. But if it is important it will probably happen Mr. Snart. Right now we need to focus on saving your friend. I would have thought that would be sufficient motivation for you.” He gave a quick glance toward Mick. “But then again, maybe not.”

Leonard took a deep breath and stifled the annoyance the comment caused him. With comments like that it was no wonder Mick had betrayed them to the Time Masters. But now wasn’t the time to worry about that. As much as he hated to admit it, Rip was right. If they didn’t save Mick now there would be no hope that things would be remotely the same. He needed to cling to that. Hopefully once they put Mick back everything would go back to the way it was supposed to be. Everything would be fine as long as everything went according to plan. Except nothing ever went according to plan. The thought was interrupted by Ray’s voice over the comm. “I got the young Mick,” he said cheerfully. Leave it to Raymond to see the bright side in even this situation.

“Everybody back to the ship,” Rip replied.

Leonard stood there watching the house burning steadily as the others headed back to the ship. Something held him there despite everything. He had never been drawn to fire the way that Mick was; he had never understood the beauty of it. But for reasons he didn’t want to dwell on this fire was hard to look away from. Without giving himself time to think about what he was doing his legs began to propel him forward, toward the flames. The heavy jacket helped to protect him, but the heat still pressed in around him, the fire sucking the air out of the room. He was vaguely aware of the voices over the earpiece as he slowly mounted the stairs. It took no effort at all to ignore their words. His feet continued to carry him forward one step at a time, closer and closer to her room. What he planned to do once he got there he didn’t know. All he could think of in the moment was reaching his destination. He was so focused on getting there that he forgot all the facts he knew about that night. When he finally made it to the bedroom the door stood ajar. The fire was slowly spreading across the floor toward the main staircase. Despite the flames dancing around him, Leonard took a moment to push the door open a little more. Sure enough, just as he’d known deep down, the room stood empty besides the flames that were slowly consuming everything in their path. Without wanting to his eyes scanned the room, taking in the signs of rapid damage. He tried to resist the urge to look toward the corner, knowing what he would find there, but in the end he lost the battle, his eyes falling on the burning cradle. The sight froze him where he stood. All the details came back to him, overwhelming his senses. Where had she gone? He’d known once, poured over the reports countless times. Where had they found her? “What the hell do you think you’re doing?” The question shocked him out of his thoughts. He turned toward the sound to find Sara glaring up at him. “Rips says we have to go before the Pilgrim finds the ship. This house won’t stand for much longer. You need to come on now. ” Her last comment was accented by a loud crash in the background as somewhere a part of the house gave into the fire.

Leonard shook his head. “Not until I find her,” he muttered, turning back to the room.

“We already found her, me and Jax, while we were searching for Mick. She’s dead.”

The word echoed a little as it reached him. “No that’s not right,” he said. “She was alive. Alive when they found her. I held her hand as she died. But where? Where did they find her?”

Sara sighed loudly. “Look, I don’t know what you’re talking about. Jax and I found the parents dead downstairs.”

“Stairs,” Len muttered to himself. “Stairs. They tried to do down the back stairs.” Before Sara could object he was off toward the back part of the house.

“Leonard,” she hissed behind him, hurrying to catch up. “What are you doing? You’re heading toward the fire! Damn it Leonard!”

He ignored her as he made his way toward the back of the house. Why didn’t he think of this before? All those precious moments wasted because he forgot they’d gone the wrong way. But now the words came back to him. ‘Found huddled together in the bathtub, both severely burned.’ The fire raged around him as he wound his way toward the upstairs bathroom. They had tried to go down the stairs. That’s what the investigators concluded. Not realizing that the fire had started in the garage, they had tried the closest exit and gotten burned. Hardly able to move, the pair had just barely made it to the bathroom. The firefighters would pull them out alive, but the damage was already done. As he now tried to find a way to them they had mere hours left to live. The thought kept echoing through his mind, but Leonard was determined not to let it consume him as he shouldered open the door. On autopilot he walked toward the tub. Sure enough there they were lying together barely clinging to survival. He addressed the back closest to him. “Penny? Pen can you move?” He reached out to the figure, trying to carefully extract her from the tub. “Sara, come help me.”

She was already beside him, looking appalled at the scene in front of them. “Jax and I didn’t see them before,” she muttered, her voice barely audible over the moans of the girl Leonard was working to save. She was staring down at the two teenagers appalled.

“Here,” he said without acknowledging she had spoken, “You take Penny. Head back the way we came.”

Sara had to move fast to let the girl lean her weight against her frame. She was obviously struggling to keep the girl upright as she pushed toward the door, but she didn’t comment. Leonard turned his attention back to the other figure. There was no sign that she was still conscious, but the shallow movement of her chest told him that she was still breathing. For a moment all he could do was state at her. How long had it been since he had finally admitted to himself that he would never see her again? Another crash nearer to where they were jogged him back to his senses. As he tried to move her he knew that it had to hurt, and it was difficult to ignore the pained moans that fell from her lips as he pulled her into his arms and carried her out of the room. The whole time all he could do was remind himself that it was necessary.

Much to his dismay Sara was waiting for him in the hall. She took one look at the girl in he held and opened her mouth to speak. “We need to get them to Gideon,” he barely managed to get out, burdened by the weight in his arms. He wasn’t sure how he was going to carry her all the way through the house, but he knew that he had to try. The thought that he might not be there for her that she might die alone was too much for him to consider. All that mattered was that they get back to the ship. That was all he could think about now.

 

The ship was chaos from the second they stepped on board. Leonard wasn’t paying attention to them as he led the way toward the med bay, but little bits stood out to him even in his distracted state. There were questions everywhere, constant movement as everybody rushed around. Rip kept asking over and over, “What have I said about changing history?”

After the fourth or fifth time Len finally cracked. “That it’s okay for you but not for the rest of us!”

There was a moment of silence as the words escaped him. Everyone had stopped arguing for a second to see how this was going to play out. Rip shook his head. “You could have gotten yourself killed. They were supposed to die in the fire, and now it would be entirely too risky to put them back.”

“Put them back?” Kendra asked in disbelief. “You do realize one of them is pregnant, right?” She pointed to the figure Leonard had struggled to carry out of the house. “How could you even suggest something like that?”

Everyone else voiced similar displeasure at Rip’s suggestion. Leonard only half listened to their protests as Rip stood there sweating under the collective glares of everyone but Mick who was busy staring at the badly burned teenage girls in front of them with a strange look on his face. “Can we save them?” he asked gruffly. It was the first thing Mick had said since they had gotten onto the ship.

Leonard’s eyes flicked to his partner. Before he could reply Rip spoke, “Technically. But they are supposed to die. It’s already happened. If they were important-“

“They are important,” Mick yelled, taking even Leonard by surprise. “They’re my sisters; they’re important to me.”

And yet you did this. The thought hit Leonard bitterly, leaving a bad taste in his mouth. The words hung in the air for a long time as he found himself unable to look at Mick anymore. “Mr. Snart has already gone to the trouble of pulling them out of the fire,” Stein pointed out suddenly. “We might as well do our best to treat them. I would think that you of all people would understand wanting to save one’s family considering this very mission is to save your own.” His last words clearly directed straight at Rip.

It was obvious that the comment properly shamed him as intended. With a sigh he spoke to the ship. “Gideon, what is the prognosis?”

If it was possible for the AI to sigh she might have too. “Both girls have suffered third degree burns, damaging the nerve endings in many places. The burns make them susceptible to illness and unable to regulate their own body temperature, not to mention the strain on their hearts and lungs due to smoke inhalation. Low chances of survival under current medical circumstances. And, of course, as long as mother is in distress, the baby will be in distress as well. The best course of action for her is probably to deliver the baby early.”

For the first time since returning to the ship Leonard truly found his voice. “No! If the baby is born now she won’t survive.”

There was a short pause as Gideon most likely accessed the historical records of the event. When the AI finally spoke there was a very pointed hush following her words, “I assure you Mr. Snart, I am far more capable of saving your daughter than any of the doctors in the 1980s.”

He ignored the shock that flowed through the room at the announcement. “Then I’m sure you are better equipped to monitor the situation than them too.”

“Of course,” she replied.

Len nodded to himself. “We focus on saving Ophelia for now and only deliver the baby as a last resort. Until then is there anything you can do?”

The others were watching him carefully as Gideon replied. “With time I can treat their burns, replace the tissue the way I replaced your hand, but without their DNA already on file that will take some time to analyze samples. There is a risk that they may not survive long enough. Right now the other sister-“ There was a short pause while Gideon examined her memory banks again, “Penelope, is in the early stages of organ failure. She is at the greatest risk of not surviving long enough, but neither girl is out of the woods. You should at least consider putting Penelope on life support.”

Somehow Leonard knew that last comment was directed at Mick instead of himself. He turned to his friend for a moment then quickly translated Mick’s grunt to Gideon. “Of course,” he said.

“Thank you for that, but at this point I am fluent in Mr. Rory.” There was a small chuckle from the corner before Gideon went on. “Professor Stein, Mr. Palmer, I will require your assistance.”

“Let me know if anything changes,” Leonard said as he shot one last look at Ophelia before making his way out of the med bay. He needed to be away from the prying eyes of the others to consider what he had done. He’d gone and potentially changed things, and there was no telling if it would do any good or not. Maybe they would all still die anyway. The thoughts consumed him as he sunk onto his bed. What would all of this mean? A sharp knock on the door frame made him look up. Sara stood there with a concerned look on her face. “You have a daughter?” she asked. Obviously she had been considering what she would say for some time, and that was what she had come up with.

“No,” he replied with a shake of his head. “My daughter died a long time ago.”

“You never told me that. And here I thought we were friends. We almost died together, and the great story you tell me from your past is how you met Mick.”

“I don’t like to talk about it.” Or think about it, he added to himself. There was a finality to his tone that she ignored.

After a moment’s thought Sara took a step into the room and asked, “What happened?”

He clenched his jaw and weighed his words. “Mick set the house on fire.” The comment was met with silence. “Other than that, no one really knows.”

“You seemed to know where you were going when we were in the house.”

It was difficult to form the words that he wanted to say. There was no way he knew to explain everything. “It’s complicated.”

She shrugged and gave him a pointed look. “I can see that much. You just never mentioned any of this. I guess that shouldn’t be much of a surprise. You aren’t really the sharing type, but like I said, I thought we were friends. You share things with friends.”

He shot her an exasperated glare. “Some things I don’t talk about. Nothing personal.”

“Maybe it would help to talk about it. Seeing as your past has made an appearance and all.” She waved a hand behind her in the general direction of the med bay.

Despite himself he found the words escaping him. “No one knows exactly what happened that night, but the investigators had theories about how they ended up in the bathroom. I read the report; that’s how I knew where to go. Though I forgot. How could I forget? I read the arson report so many times that I committed it to memory, and yet when I needed it, the knowledge failed me.” He took a deep breath. “Ophelia has, had, trouble sleeping. I think she must have woken up and seen the smoke, known what it meant. By an unfortunate series of events the batteries in the smoke detectors were all dead. Just one of those bizarre twists of fate. Arsonist brother comes home, no one thinks to check that the smoke detectors are still working.” He laughed bitterly at the thought. “She must have known that Penny wouldn’t get out unless she woke her up. That’s the only reason I can think of that she would have headed away from the main stairs, away from the exit. She went to get her sister, and they must have tried going down the back stairs together. The report said it was something called back draft; that’s how they got burned. When they opened the door at the bottom of the stairs there was a sudden influx of oxygen or something. How they managed to make it back up the stairs and to the bathroom, no one knows. The experts said it was a miracle they survived at all. I think they were trying to get out the front door but couldn’t make it that far and figured the bathtub might be a safe place to wait. But that’s just speculation. Penny never woke up, and Ophelia could never explain it. Or maybe I didn’t ask. I had other concerns then. You know, in a few hours I’m supposed to watch her die. But if Mick isn’t around to tell me what happened…” He trailed off at the thought.

Sara appeared to take that in stride. “So when she dies the baby dies?”

Leonard shook his head again. “No, they convince me that there is a chance to save the baby, but she’s too small and doesn’t last long. Must not have been meant to be. I sometimes wonder if I should have said no and spared her those few days of pain.”

“You couldn’t have known what would happen. Babies are born early and survive all the time. At least you gave her the chance to live. I bet you anything that if you had said no that you’d still be standing here beating yourself up over the decision. You’d say why didn’t I try? Why didn’t I at least give her the chance to live? And anyway, Gideon is calling the shots now. That’s better than any doctor she might have had before.”

“Her mother would say that we did this. She told us it was bad luck to name the baby before she was born. This from the woman who named her own child Ophelia. Talk about bad luck.” He shot Sara a look out of the corner of his eye. “But what do I know? The kid was probably better off without me. What could she have possibly been if she had lived? At this point in my life I can’t even get away from my own father despite the fact that I hate him more every day. That kid was better off dead, and here I’ve gone and messed everything up for her.” He sighed heavily.

Sara’s response was cut off my Gideon. “Mr. Snart, Miss Rory is awake and asking for someone called Leo. I assume that is you.”

“Leo?” Sara asked as Leonard made his way back to the med bay.

 

When he entered the room it was to find an extremely panicked Raymond trying to restrain a struggling teenage girl. Surprisingly the girl was winning. “You need to lay still; we’re trying to help you.” He shot a look over his shoulder. “A little help here? I’m trying not to hurt her, but she keeps trying to get up.”

“Where am I?” the girl demanded, trying to throw off Ray’s hands despite her injuries. The sound of her voice froze Leonard suddenly. Even with her throat ravaged by the fire hearing her speak was like being sixteen again.

“I told you, a special burn hospital,” Ray tried to lie. “When you move I can’t monitor your baby properly.”

“You or the invisible lady?”

Ray looked uncomfortable. “I understand that you are scared and confused, but everyone here is trying to help you. That voice you heard was just a computer alerting me that we weren’t getting a good reading of your vitals.”

The look on her face was almost funny. Len had forgotten that her face used to scrunch up like that when she was annoyed. It hurt his heart in places he didn’t know still retrained feeling. Places shut down when her and their child slipped away. When she spoke her thoughts came out jumbled. “Computers don’t talk! Unless. Is this the future? But time travel isn’t possible yet. Could be possible, some day. I’m not stupid though. Future or not I refuse to have a doctor that I can’t see. Where’s Leo? Did you bring him too? I have to go! You can’t hold me against my will; I have rights! Leo!” She tried yelling but immediately dissolved into a coughing fit.

Leonard ran to her bedside as Ray tried to push the oxygen mask back onto her face. Even coughing uncontrollably she was putting up a good fight, swatting Ray’s hand away. “You need to wear this,” he said as Len added his own hand to the struggle.

Finally with the two of them were able to get the oxygen mask back on her face. Though it was clear she was no more at ease, the girl gave up trying to escape for the time being. The coughing fit had obviously sapped a lot of her strength. Looking down at her brought back painful memories. “How is she able to move like that?” he asked, forcing his eyes back up to Ray. He wanted to add that it hadn’t been possible all those years ago in the hospital but decided against it at the last second.

“Some kind of new pain medicine that pretty much blocks out everything. Neither Stein nor I had heard of it, but Gideon assured us it wouldn’t hurt the baby.” There was a significant pause where the look Leonard shot him challenged Ray to try and comment further. Eventually the inventor choose to err on the side of caution and returned to his explanation. “As I tried to explain to her, she doesn’t realize how hurt she is.” The girl glared up at Leonard curiously as Ray shot him a pointed look that was promptly ignored.

A hoarse voice interrupted their exchange. “Why are you old?” Ophelia asked, squinting at Leonard.

He looked down at the sound of her voice, throat ravaged by the coughing and the smoke. It was difficult to look directly at her. This was how she had looked in the hospital all those years ago, and seeing the burns covering the left side of her body brought back painful memories. She was watching him carefully, as he tried to find a way to answer the question. “I’m not that old,” was the only response he could come up with.

The vivid red hand pushed the oxygen mask back up around her mouth. It was hard to look away from the movement as she took a deep breath and pulled it away again. “I don’t understand what’s happening. Why are we here? The liar said this is a hospital, but I don’t believe him.” She leaned a little toward Leonard. “Is he still here? I can’t see over there, but I heard him talking. Leo, what’s going on?” Her voice carried traces of barely controlled panic. She wouldn’t show weakness in front of strangers. After all, she was a Rory. She studied him for a moment. “Leo?” she whispered again.

Hearing the name was uncomfortable. “I’m not Leo,” he lied quickly.

She surveyed him carefully again. “I saw Mick earlier. Ran out of here the second he was I was awake, but I know it was him. He was old too.”

“Mick?” Leonard worked to keep his face neutral as he spoke. 

“Don’t play stupid Leonard! You were in juvie with my brother,” she snapped.

“Oh that explains so much,” Ray muttered.

Len chose to ignore him. “I think that maybe you’re confused. I saw your brother earlier, and I assure you that he is only a couple of years older than you.”

She appeared to think that over for a second. “Two Micks? That’s scary. I thought maybe it was the time travel that made you old, some kind of mistake, but I see now. I’ve been taken to a future point where you and my brother are already old. Am I around here old too?”

Ray was obviously trying not to laugh; Leonard continued to ignore him. “We have you on a lot of drugs to keep you from feeling your injuries, and obviously you are a little confused.”

“What about Ellie? Where’s she?”

Involuntarily Leonard found himself struck dumb by the question. There was a long moment before he managed to find the words. “If you would like I can go get your brother. He’s the only person that was able to come with you to the hospital. Do you think that you would like to see him?”

The look she gave him was difficult to read. She shook her head. “I can’t see him yet. I know that he can’t help it; that he’s sick. But I don’t want to see him. Maybe later but not now.”

“What is she talking about?” Ray asked, looking quickly at Leonard.

“Why won’t you answer my question?” Ophelia asked. “Where’s our daughter?”

Len chose to ignore both questions. He had no idea how he was supposed to explain everything to this girl. When he rushed into the fire to save her he didn’t consider this, that she might recognize him even after all these years. She had always been so smart, so perceptive. He wanted so much to tell her everything, but in the end he could never find the words. Maybe she was the person that he had known all those years ago, but he wasn’t the person that she had known. “You’re confused,” he said, “I’m not Leo. Now, we are going to help you in any way that we can. Right now we are monitoring you, your baby, and your sister. Ray here will answer any medical questions you may have. You should get some rest though. Let Ray know if you change your mind about seeing your brother.”

With a small nod he left the med bay without another word. He was surprised to find that his steps led him toward Mick’s room. When he pushed open the door he found his partner sitting at his desk drinking a beer. A small click told him that Mick had been playing with his dad’s lighter as he sat there. The sound caused his jaw to clench. Neither man said anything for a long moment, the air between them tense. “I didn’t want her to die alone,” Len finally said. “That’s all I wanted. Now what have I done?”

Mick grunted. “Ophelia awake?”

“She knew me. How is that possible? She’s half blind, and still she recognized me.” He laughed despite everything. The sound echoed around the room. “She thinks that she’s been abducted to the future.”

Mick found himself laughing too, though his laughter was darker. Even with how long they had known each other Leonard struggled to know Mick’s thoughts in that moment. When his friend finally spoke his voice was hollow. “Of course she does. That girl was obsessed with time travel her whole life.” The words clearly stuck in his throat a little.

Leonard watched him for a long moment. How had they survived this before? Those memories seemed hazy somehow, like he’d buried them deep and almost forgotten. Was it because he’d known Mick first? Because he was all that Leonard had left of her? Neither seemed completely the truth. All their years stretched out in front of him, haunting him. So many words he’d left unspoken over all those years. They’d never talked about, not once. Maybe because the one time they had come close they had come to blows. But that was years ago; they were children then. And it was fresh. Maybe now… He opened his mouth to speak, to say what he had always meant to say. Instead different words fell from his lips, though no less true. “She saw me Mick, knew me. But I can’t. All I see when I look at her is how she died. I see the sadness and the pain. The person she remembers is gone. I lost him in the fire too.”

Before Mick could speak Leonard had already turned to leave. Maybe later. Maybe in another thirty years he’d be ready to hear an apology, an explanation. But he couldn’t hear it today. As he took a step forward a voice spoke tentatively into the silence of the hall, following Leonard but not quite. It was soft, laced with a twinge of sadness. “Never call me Leo again.”


End file.
